I find myself trying to remind myself of all the positive things about my oldest child. She is smart, funny, sassy, loving, and generally a good kid. This morning was one of those mornings where I wanted to sell her to the highest bidder.

It all started while I was straightening her hair. Yes, I get up at 6:00 a.m. ,after being up throughout the night breast feeding, to straighten hair because I am such a horrible mother…..  I told her we had to hurry because she still had to eat breakfast. Emily asked if she could have breakfast at school.

*Begin rant* How am I, as a parent, supposed to encourage good eating habits when the school continues to offer sugar, sodium, cholesterol, and saturated fat laden foods to our children? I refuse to participate in a program that undermines the health of my child by offering her these train wrecks of a meal. *Rant over*

Now, she does eat hot lunch once or twice a month by her choice so I am not a total tyrant.

Anyway.

The answer was no, she could not eat breakfast at school- we have food here and I would make her something. I was not prepared for all hell to break loose. I mostly ignored her and cut up an apple with a side of peanut butter- I know, I am such a witch… Emily looked at me like I am not eating that- and she didn't- it is still on the table.

She went to school with a few tiny bites of apple in her belly. I know she took those minuscule bites just so she could say she ate some. I will spend a good portion of the day thinking of what her punishment will be for talking to me like she did. Perhaps a week of chicken duty will remind her to bite her tongue when she doesn't get her way.

I will leave you with a picture that made me laugh even after she acted so wretched this morning. You gotta love a kid that will take a portabella mushroom and use it as a mustache….