Week Five

As I was pondering what I would write this week it occurred to me that this weekly check in is stressing me out. I think it is important to be honest and open about my journey, but I don't always feel like writing about it on Tuesdays. Seems silly to make it a rule that I have to do it on a Tuesday and I don't like rules… shocking, isn't it?

So this past week was a tough one. I had a few breakdowns involving lots of tears, anger, and just generally feeling sorry for myself. I have a lot of emotions coming up and I want so badly to calm them with food. Old habits die hard and food addiction is no exception.

I am not perfect. I ate a piece of goat cheese pizza on Sunday. It was the Super Bowl and I gave myself permission to eat something that I should not. It was a typical line of thinking…. It is a special occasion, you deserve it. Afterwards, I felt guilty and realized that I did not enjoy it enough to justify the feelings that come with it. While I am committed to this new lifestyle, I am not perfect and expect that I will have some slipups along the way. I can take those slipups and learn from them and adjust my behavior.

I wanted to write a little about the plan that I am following. I feel this plan is the only thing that can work for me. In the summer of 2008 I read a book called Eat To Live by Dr. Joel Fuhrman . When I read it the first time I was not emotionally ready to commit to what he was prescribing. Now I am.  Basically, I eat nutrient dense foods and avoid disease causing foods. For me, diets and calorie counting would never work. Or I guess it could work if I could stick to it. It could work to maintain an ideal weight, but not necessarily excellent health.  As long as I was not eating nutrient dense foods my body would crave more and more of the disease causing foods in an attempt to get the nutrients that I was not eating. I was overfed and undernourished. So I am not only looking to attain my ideal weight but to be in excellent health. To achieve excellent health I must eat a superior diet filled with vegetables, fruit, beans, raw nuts, seeds, and some unprocessed whole grains. By maintaining an excellent diet my weight will naturally end up where it needs to be. No calorie counting, no diets, and no stress. I will add in some regular exercise as well. By avoiding the disease causing foods I am overcoming my food addiction and cravings for sugar, salt and unhealthy fats. I recommend this book and Dr. Fuhrman's other books to anyone looking to achieve excellent health.

*Edited to add: Dr. Fuhrman's plan can be adjusted to include small amounts of meat and non-fat dairy.

Today is my first appointment with my new therapist. I am a little anxious and nervous about it. I know that I must get the psychological aspect of all of this taken care of and get the tools I need to adjust my compulsive behavior when it comes to food. It is easier said than done.

So I lost 4 pounds this week for a total of 17 lbs in 5 weeks.  I think I am going to stop updating on Tuesdays specifically and update when I feel like writing about it. I may post about it everyday one week and none the next, we'll see how it goes.