Tomorrow, Ava will make her stage debut in her school's performance of The Nutcracker. I have no idea what they have the two-year-olds doing, I just hope Ava does it.
The Christmas funk has descended on me. I got through the tree decorating with out scotch, so I thought I was doing pretty well. I don't know what it is- maybe the busy stores, mindless consumerism, rude shoppers, or the people in parking lots that clearly should not be driving. I do enjoy Ava's uninhibited excitement about Christmas.
I had a random crying incident for the first time in quite awhile.Yesterday, I checked Ava's mailbox at school after I dropped her off in her classroom. Apparently, they took make-up school pictures for the kids that missed them. She started school after picture day. I looked at them and that feeling that I had to get out of there came over me. I held the sobs in until I got to the car. The pictures looked so much like Kevin. Messy hair and goofy smile… I was caught off guard. They need to warn me if they do shit like that. Of course, the school would have no idea that school pictures would send me over the edge. I think what brought the tears was the fact that Kevin did not live long enough to get school pictures. I will never have any awkward photos of him with his hair sticking up. Something so simple, yet it hit me like a ton of bricks.
My brother, his wife, and adorable baby are in town this weekend. I am looking forward to spending time with them.
I will sign off with the announcement that Matt ate roasted squash. Much to his surprise he did not die. He actually kind of liked it.